2018 - what happened?
Yesterday, I watched the vlog
of Roxanne Barcelo regarding her 12 updates of her life. And I was like, yeah,
what happened with my 2019? no, my 2018? So sige, simulan ko sa 2018.
December 18,2018 - I got
married. He's the same man na naiblog ko na dito. My best friend, the first man
I truly love. May mga naiblog na din ako dito that I thought na love ko, crush
lang pala, like they are just image of men I liked.
"Dear" – sya yun. Siya yung blog ko
last November 2012. Same month that I told the Lord that I’m in love with the
person na friend lang ang tingin saken. Sobrang nalilito ako during those times,
I was falling hard, and I didn’t know what to do. I prayed, nagnovena ako,
nagbigay ako ng mga conditions kay Lord. Kung hindi sya, sana ilayo nya ako sa
kanya or sya saken, sana magka girlfriend sya, or mabaling ang atensyon ko sa iba.
I
was so scared kasi lagi ko na sya hinahanap, every morning nasanay na ako na
makakausap ko sya. And it felt so different sa mga inakala kong mahal ko.
Everytime magkikita kami, I was just so excited, I didn’t feel nervous, hindi
ako na aawkwardan, masaya ako pagnagkikita kami at masaya ako pagnakakasama ko
sya. I can just be me to him and we became so close at kahit anong topic pag
usapan namen, it was always never ending. Also the first time na umamin ako kay
Lord and sa mga closest friend ko na may iba na akong nararamdaman! Haha
Sa sobrang takot ko, nagtry ako iwasan
mga text and calls niya. Hahaha! Hindi ko kaya but I was so proud that from January
– February 2013, bilang lang mga exchanges of messages namen noon. I felt so
relieved kasi akala ko, keri ko na, kelangan lang pala ang iwasan. But I was
wrong again! Hahaha! Lagi kong binabantayan ang phone ko, mga nakadrafts na
messages, kung isesend ko ba or hindi. Tapos pag tinataong niya ako kung sobrang
busy ko daw ba bat di ako nagrereply, feeling ko nun, he was falling for me na
din. Kapal. Hahaha! Kasi feeling ko he misses me na! Anyway, nung birthday ko
nung March, nagmessage sya ng happy birthday, sa sobrang rupok ko, ininvite ko
sya sa celebration namen. And sa sobrang arte at pabebe ko na din, nagpahatid
ako sa bahay ng lasing. Haha! Nung nahimasmasan ako kinaumagahan, di na ulit ako
nagparamdam. From that time till end of May, solid na hindi na kami masyado
nag-uusap. I felt good pero sobrang namimiss ko talaga. I asked the Lord then,
eto na ba yun Lord, yung sagot mo na hindi pa sya yung right man?
During those iwas time ko, I searched-in.
Pumunta ako sa isang seminary. I discerned and asked guidance kung ano ba
talaga ang plano ni Lord for me. Once in a while, we exchanged messages pero
sobrang dalang ko na talaga magreply, I was so serious na sabi ko, kelangan may
answer na for me. I don’t want to waste time, kasi di na ako bata.
Right before my second seminary
visit, he called and asked me kung pwede ba daw kami magdinner? Tutuparin niya
lang daw promise niya saken dati na he will treat me dinner pag first salary
niya sa new job niya. I was like, Lord what is this? Marupok pa din ako and I
really need guidance. So sabi ko, sige fine. Sasama ako to try kung ano ang
mararamdaman ko ulit pagnagmeet kami. Well, guess what? Bumalik kami sa dati,
we became so close again, we talked about life, plans and the influence of SFC
to our lives. Mas nakilala ko sya ng malalim.
After our MMC recon, nagkaron pa
kami ng issue with our brothers and sisters kasi sa Tita niya kami natulog. But
during those time, mas lalong naggrow yung feelings ko for him, I don’t know
why, pero I knew na he likes me na rin (kapal! Haha!) So ayun, after the recon,
I told him I love him. Hindi lang yung gusto, kundi mahal. Sobrang strong na ng
pakiramdam ko na kelangan ko na sya iconfess no matter what, positive or hindi
man ang sagot. So I did it. And the reply? Tadaaaaaaaa…
Friend… He likes me as a friend
and masaya daw sya na kasama ako. I told the Lord, enough na. If friendship,
fine, friends. Hindi na ako umiwas, pero nabunutan ako ng tinik. Hindi na din
ako umasa, but we remained friends, nag oopen up padin sya saken, and give advices
kung kelangan. But I controlled myself and moved on little by little. Not so
good ang feeling pero nagtry na akong iopen ang chances ko to look on to others.
Naks! Hahaha! I started texting some random people from the past, mga nirereto
and all. But nothing compares! Char! But! I. remained. Strong!
So ayun na nga, sabi nila
mapagbiro ang tadhana. November, I got sick, naadmit ako sa hospital and di ko
sinabi sa mga friends ko, pero sympre, nakarating pa din sa kanya ang balita.
He went there drunk, iniwan daw niya ang tito at pinsan niya na nag-iinuman when
he our friend told him na nasa hospital ako. Di ko alam kung matutuwa ako, or
maiinis. But he was there. He stayed 5 days sa hospital.
The rest is history. He went to
Sorsogon December 26,2013, and officially, in front ni Mamadear, December 30, mag
GG na kami.
Obviously, the Lord wanted us to
be together. We got married and we were both happy that we made our promise to
the Lord. December 18, we sealed it.
<More on 2013 pala ang update
ko. Haha! Medyo shy pa ako noon iblog ang totoong feelings ko for him kasi nga
may iwas factor pa, but yeah, 2013 is actually about us>
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